Rainfall Record

Since October it rained 47 inches here

(in the last 14 days my eyes have rained more).


On day 9 it was a middle of the night collapse:

full sobs and remorse.

I loathed our comfy glider, the room

we’d created for you.

It had become an isolation tank

where we tortured each other

with multiple attempts at painful latches.


On day 15 it was midmorning

and I listened, breath held, at the bottom

of the stairs while he settled in to that glider

and fed you.

There were no screams.


I covered my mouth and sprinted

downstairs, relief thundering through me.

But it was laced

with droplets of grief over the released connection

between you and I.


The weather has cleared recently

(my eyes are getting there…I think).

In a lot of ways, this isn’t easier

but the sum of us

is greater.


And that’s all that matters.


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